Premier amour !

Ses yeux me manquent, son regard, sa bouche, son teint, son ange ... Son TOUT . Je sais pas quoi faire, parler avec lui ou rester seule dans ma tristesse? Quoi faire? J'ai commis beaucoup d'erreurs , je suis la fautive...Oui . Mais, comment il a resté tous ces mois sans me parler ou seulement m'envoyer un petit message pour savoir est-ce-que je me sens bien après lui ou non, il sait déjà que je sens la plus heureuse du monde auprès de lui.
Plusieurs sentiments, plusieurs mots pour décrire mon amour vers lui, un nom qui est collé dans ma mémoire, une personne qui a pris mon cœur, une lettre qui est commune dans nos prénoms, la lettre A.
En bref, ça fait 1 an et 9 mois que je t'aime, t'es la source de mon bonheur et parfois la source de mon malheur.
Enfin, J’espère que tu verras mes mots, mes sentiments, ce texte . Je t'aime

THE ONE ... the only one

when i'm looking to your eyes is like counting stars, i wish i could be a better me for you, you had stolen my heart but it's okay i don't want it back. writing your name on the mirror after my shower'n remembering every word that you said to me'n smiling !
I still remember the first day i met you, i'm in love with you more today than i was yesterday, i need you more that i need air, i love you more than i love myself. I still remember our first kiss, the moment when you kissed me 'n my heart start beating faster than it was and you touched it then i remember when you said to me : Don't worry honey i'll be always with you, and i still remember when you told me that your best music is Hush Hush by pussicat dolls .

P.S: I WILL LOVE YOU UNTIL INFINITY RUNS OUT 

Emotions.... :(

Congratulations...!! You've managed to make me feel like a worthless piece of shit again. would you like an award for that ? I feel so fucking stupid for still loving you ! you really hurt me. why am i so afraid to lose you when you are not even mine :3
I don't know if i still love you or not but guess what , every single night i think about you, everyday i see your account on facebook to know your news, i'm dreaming to see you, i miss you so much ! no one understands what's wrong with me and so i do ! when we broke up every day i make the same things : asking about your news, seeing your account, listening to our favourite music, remembering all the the good things that we did, the nights that we passed on skype, and all the shit that you've just lied to me !
Please don't be in love with someone else!..
you didn't broke my heart, you totaly destroyed it ! i'm jealous of people who get to see you everyday.
we used to talk everyday, now it's like we don't know each other anymore.
I always wonder what goes throught your head when you hear my name!! it was so real for me but clearly love is just a game for you.
The absence of you is killing me you are my one in 6 billion....:'(
And finally, you cannot see all my scars your love has caused

Let you go !

when i'm happy i can't stop talking but when i'm sad i don't say a word, i just keep my silence and go away, far away. Sometimes, i miss the days when the homework was just colouring, when my own dream is to see my mom the happiest women in the world, when my own hope is to growing up, when i was afraid from the darkness ... i really miss my innocent, my childhood, my smile when i was child!
I can't lie to myself, i passed with him the greatest days in my whole life, i loved him more than myself, but he always say that i'm the one who makes the problems ! okay, that's he's opinion, but he doesn't even loved me like i do, be jalous like me, be th one who says sorry, i always say sorry to him even when it's not my fault ! he makes always the bad girl ! i can't lie also   to myself nd say that he loved me because he doesn't ! he passed time with me ! he makes me just for fun and for his free time . Guess what ?  that's hurt me ! my heart just say enough ....is enough ! you make me the bad'n the uggliest  person in the world and you're just like an innocent ! you act like the innocent person who doesn't hurt people but you hurt me a lot!
take a few seconds and tell your self why she loved me ! i'll tell you why ! i loved you because only the good girls fall in love with bad boys and you're a bad boy ;)
I finally decide to let you go from my heart and my mind because you don't deserve to think about you for just a little while !

Make them wonder why you still smilling...!

Tell me the story of how the sun loved the moon so much, he died every night to let her breath.
I want this story so badly, the story that makes me feeling that i'm loved by the person who i love.
I'm not perfect, i'll annoy you, say stupid things and then take them back again. But you'll never find a girl that loves you more than me.
I wish my life was like a Nicholas Sparks book ! I just want to grab your hand and be like "You're mine ".I could spend hours looking at you and your smile.
I just want to say from the bottom of my heart that i'll kill you if i see you with any BITCH ! :) 
I lost you so much ... i can't lose you again too ! Nothing is like it was .

Romance is easy... love is not !

A true relashionship is when you can tell each other anything and everything ! No lies, no secrets.
I live, i love, i cry, i lose, i bleed, i scream ... I learn . I finally found LOVE on page 364 in the dictionnary and it means that love be respected by two not just by one and it doesn't hurt but YOU hurt me so i'm not in love.
No ones perfect until you fall in love with them ! I want you to just hold me and say to me that you still love me. You said you'll never leave me, you promise me that you'l never let me go but you did the opposite :-(
They ask me : Do you miss him . then i said : hell no ! but my heart say : Everyday ... Everyday !
So just take my hand, you know that i'll never leave your side ! I want to be yours now .. next week... years from now and forever !

I don't care anymore :)

I was there for you, remember that ;) will you miss me when i'm gone ? i went so do you have any thing to say it for me?  of course no ! can i tell you some shit ? you deserve a award for the best lie ;) all the shit that you said were just a big lie from you ! I don't care now ! I don't care about you !
Do what you want, say what you want to say, stay or leave, come or go... I don't give a fuck !
You said that i should move on, you don't want me anymore ! ok i'll show what i can do ;) I'm strong enough
Don't think that without you the world stops! you're definitly wrong honey ;) You were everything for me, you meant the world to me bt guess what you're nothing now  ! if you left me without a reason don't come back with an excuse :)
Yes, I've changed ! Pain does  that to people ! you hurt me enough ! I hate you
I choose to be happy ! i choose you but i was wrong ! I choose the wrong person to fall in love with :)
It's time to move on ! we should love, not fall in love because everything that falls gets broken.
Your words hurt me enough more than anything !
             
                                                                              Congratulations! You lost me :)

fucking bad story

we broke up! you broke my heart into pieces, you killed me, you make me feel that i'm the worst girl in this fucking world ! you know already that i can't imagine my life without you. i don't deserve you i deserve better than you ! you killed a heart that it love you more than itself, i believe now that there'is no happy endings.
i wanna move on but i can't i just can't i don't know the reason but i can't ! I love you enough maybe you give me so much things to remember you, maybe  it's my fault because i love you more than love could be !
Damn,no escape from the storm inside of me ! telling myself everything is gonna be okay... :(
please don't let me go because i'll never let you go : you are the missing part of me ....



I love you !

Quelque chose qui m'a arraché le coeur....! :(

En Bref : je t'aime
J'ai jamais vécu ce sentiment sauf avec toi, j'ai sentis que j'appartiens plus a moi, tu es mon obsession. l'idée de t'oublier est impossible car tu possède dejà tout mes pensées, et je vais jamais imaginer ma vie sans toi! Te perdre c'est mourir silencieusement... :) Je souffre sans toi et je songe a ma solitude.
Je te veux pour moi a jamais, et jamais je n'accepterai te partager avec n'importe qui  !!
Merde, t'es précieux  et si cher .. tu n'es pas comme les autres.. t'es unique et tu seras toujours unique.
Notre histoire ne ressemble a aucune telle, tu es l'homme qui a arraché mon cœur, qui a pris mon esprit, et qui m'a poussé à la folie . 
 Tu étais la source de mon bonheur et maintenant t'es le synonyme de mon malheur !
Le plus important que j'ai pris une leçon de morale de ta part : c'est de ne jamais donner mon tout pour ne perdre tout .
éeeeh me voila, perdu, seule, épuisé,faible, cœur brisé ...!
Tu as choisi ta destination mais moi j'ai pas choisi mon destin
tu m'as montré un homme que tu caches au fond de toi et je te jure que personne ne pourrai l’apercevoir.
Enfin, et après tout je ne regrette pas et si j'ai envie de retourner en arrière je vais changer rien sauf que tu me mériterais .

My man's birthday

Today, the best day in this mounth!  it's the day when my first love;my man; was born.
we passed an amazing day ! i can't describe my feeling ,how happy i am! Best feeling ever: Being loved by the person you love. when i saw him , i just can't stop smiling all the time ! if i have you, if you're always mine, if you're always be in my side...everything will be okay!
I love look at him when he smiles! i can't get enough from him ! An amazing day with him...i just can't get enough from his love .
Romeo & Juliette ? - No, I prefer You & Me <3  Damn Damn Damn , everytime i see you, i fall in love all over again . 
I'm going to change your life, i'm that girl :p !



I LOVE YOU !                                                                                    <3

Something ... some shit in my heart

Sometimes i feel like i'm so desappointed then you was you the reason, the reason of everything !
you're always the one for me, and you'll stay . I don't know what the fuck is wrong with you, everytime i said that you changed and you'll be better than the past i discover that i was wrong ! You'll never change ! i'm just tired of everything ... of you ! Someday; you'll regret, you'll do because you'll lose a heart that it love  you more than itself ! a soul t that it love you more than itself ! a person that it love you more than itself ! A girl that she love you more than herself ..
I give you all the shit that you want  ( I give you a heart ) try to not lose it ;))
I miss the old you ! the old guy that i met at the first time ...

Sometimes LOVE is not enough, if you love me prove it, if you care about me show it, if you you give a shit on me tell me ! I'm tired of beeing the one who wait your love! who wait your attention ! who wait your proves about showing me your real love !
I guess you want to move on ! I guess if i love you i'll let you go ! but i'm scared to lose you .
I LOVE YOU , IDIOT ! you must understand that ! you must understand the meaning of love.
So many tears for nothing... Silence speaks when words can't.
                                                                                                      THE END.

My words have wings, but they don’t fly where I want them to.

Everything that kills me makes me feel alive !
Just keep moving forward and don't give a shit about what anybody thinks. Do what you have to do, for you. Try to make your own  décisions even if you discover someday that they were wrong because at least you'll acquire wisdom if you don't succeed. Whatever comes, let it come. What stays, let it stay. What goes, let it go! Nobody can destroy your dreams just you have to kill people in your mind if you wanna change your life to the best. In your life, you meet people. Some you never think about again. Some, you wonder what happened to them. There are some that you wonder if they ever think about you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again. Every second is a chance to turn your life around, everything is Ok if it's not ok then it's not the end. 
 Time decides who you meet in life, your heart decides who you want in your life, and your behavior decides who stays in your life. Everything is getting expensive except some people, they are getting cheaper.
 N.B:
 When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile.

Do you remember ? - Forever .

I'm happy right now but i'm afraid to be happy because every time i'm happy, something went wrong, and hurts me!
once upon a time, my friend ask me " you think the stories have always a happy endings ? " then i said " Happy endings are just a stories that haven't finished yet . " ! You can't really choose who you fall in love with :)
we live alone, we die alone. everything else is just an illusion. 
words are just words until you prove them with actions, i may not be the best but i'm definitely not like the others.
when i close my eyes all i see is you ! I'm all yours if you are all mine, everything i do reminds me on you!
i will always care for you, even we're far, far away from each other ! cu'z you light up my world like nobody else! 
Can i tell you a secret ? I've always loved you . I will never forget the moment i realised i was in love with you

You can close your eyes to the things you don't want to see, but you can't close your heart to the things you don't want to feel ! When life puts you in tough situations don't say "why me? " , say " try me ".
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same . never regret something that once made you smile. Everything happens for a reason so you  must always thank God !

WORK HARD, TRUST GOD, ENJOY LIFE :-)

One of the hardest  parts of life is deciding whether to walk away or try harder! Find someone who knows how lucky they are to have you !

I deserve somebody who gives a shit -_- Really !!   


                                                                                             #Desappointed

It's a long way but i'm not lost

It's funny how i'm good at giving advice to others, but when it comes to helping myself, i don't know what to do.
Maybe i don't cry but it hurts, maybe i won't say but i feel, maybe i don't show but i care!
it kills me to imagine you with anybody else :(  You are my happy place...!
But i think if i love you i should let you move on . I try not to miss you, i try to let you go, but in the end, you're always in my mind! I don't wanna lose you now i'm looking right  at the other half of me!
CAN I JUST DISAPPEAR ? YOU HURT ME ENOUGH !!
I miss your smile but i miss mine more!
Someday , someone's gonna love the wanted you to need me . someday , someone's gonna take your place.
one day, i'll forget about you ! you'll see , i won't even miss you ! Someday , someday....
You are my one in 6 billion ! we may not be together but  you're always in my mind.
I never thought i'd love you so much!
I miss you; there's nothing i could say, I just miss you ..........!

My first love

The first love; first met; first story...!

14th october, 2013 the story began;
from our first talk i felt that he's the chosen !  the one who  will take my heart! take everything on me!
AT the beginning,  i tried to understand him, know what he like or what he dislike, know what the important thing in his life, his passion, his attitude, everything about him.

he's everything for me now, everything changed from the beginning !

we was happy until this month .... he totally changed !
the problems start  ! so at the moment i don't know what to do .
i wanna just forget all the things, all the problems and start a new page with him !
i really love him a lot ! he's my first love and i can't deny i love him more than myself !
i love him cu'z not everyone thinks the way i think, knows the things i know, believes the things i believe bue he does !

chapter 1

Dear Readers;

I write cu'z i wanna share my feelings with you! I'm a teenager ; 17 years old from a beautifull city .

I passed my childhood with my grandparents, until i had 15 years old i left my hometown to live with my parents in a small city ! At the begining; i was happy for the idea but now i blame myself cu'z i found that it's a really really the worst idea ! I didn't find a good friends, i was lonely ! i passed 2years without my grand father, i miss him a lot! Some people in this city think that i'm sullfish but i don't care what they think of me, i'm proud of myself and proud of what i do ! It's my life and no one can makes me do what he wants or she wants ... I passed from a big problems 'n i still strong that's why i'm proud of me, proud of beeing me  :)

I don't care about haters ! I don't care about bitches !